“Your recollections, and those of others, are unique and vital to your family’s story.” So says The Source, Ancestry’s large guidebook of American Genealogy. “As these memories undergo the rigors of examination, selection, evaluation, and recording, they become the foundation upon which additional research will be built.” By making the effort to plan and conduct interviews of relatives—especially older relatives—you can jump start what would take years of research in documents.
Who is Likely to have Important Family Memories?
This question almost seems silly. Anyone in the extended family can have memories of key events or data. But this is the point. You really shouldn’t leave anyone out. We normally think we should talk with elderly ancestors. They are the ones who would know the oldest stories, who should know the most, and who will probably be able to share memories.
Talk with the most elderly ancestors first. Don’t limit this to those in your direct line: parents, grandparents, great-grandparents. Go to any of their siblings and cousins who are living. See what they remember. Not all siblings carry the same memories, and you never know which of several children remember earlier generations best.
Some opportunities may present themselves unexpectedly. I learned of a 95 year old cousin of my grandmother living in the West Indies. I couldn’t travel there, but quickly wrote him to ask about one nagging family question. He graciously wrote back and was able to fill in the gap. In another case I learned that a 96 year old cousin of my father-in-law was still alive. The family had lost contact with that branch. We quickly made a trip to see him, and obtained valuable information before he passed away the next year.
Once you’ve interviewed “the old folks”, move on to the next generation. Many people will remember stories their grandparents told of their grandparents. That’s five generations of information that might be in the mind of someone not that old. Certainly talk with the most elderly first, for the time is shorter in which to tap their memories. But then move on to others.
Conducting an Effective Genealogy Interviews
Planning is a big part of holding an effective interview. While impromptu interviews might happen during holiday times or reunions, planning will bring the best results. Who do you want to know more about? What happened during the blizzard of ‘48? When did certain events happen? Why did the family move?
Be prepared to take notes or, if possible, to make a sound or video recording of the interview. Make sure the interviewee agrees to this. If not, notes will have to suffice. Have questions prepared on paper. Think about how you will proceed. Usually you start with some general questions about that era in the family, and work to things more specific. Or, as a memory is given, this brings a question to your mind.
Some things seem so obvious that they almost don’t need to be mentioned. Dress appropriately. Show courtesy. Be mindful of the weariness of the interviewee. Know when to take a break, or to stop. Be thankful to the person sharing what might have been buried for fifty years. Ask if the interviewee would be willing to review your notes once you get them written, to make sure you got everything complete and right.
Prompting for More Memories After a Genealogy Interview
Many times an interview will have progressed for a while, then the relative will say, “And that’s all I remember.” That tends to shut down the interview. You are pleased with all that you learned, and the interviewee is pleased at having been asked to share and with sharing. All seems well.
But when you transcribe your notes, or even later as you learn other things about the family, you might wonder whether the one you interviewed could tell more. At that point it’s okay to prompt the other person. I interviewed my mother-in-law about her maternal grandparents, and she gave me a treasure trove of information, then said, “That’s all I really remember.” As time went on, however, and I learned more from research, I kept going back to her and asking about specific things. She always had a memory to help me, despite her having said, “That’s all I remember,” in the earlier interview. Prompts helped bring more memories to mind.
Three ways to prompt for more memories are:
- Write the results of the previous interview into a narrative and show it to the person. Just seeing that in print might spur the memory, or at a minimum they can correct anything you had wrong or incomplete.
- Ask for something specific. If you learn something from another source, ask the interviewee if he or she remembers that, or knows anything about it. Specific questions usually bring out memories better than general questions.
- If possible take the relative back to the old home place, and see if that spurs anything. We took my mother-in-law to her grandparent’s homestead, now in ruins, with the dugout home gone except for the foundation and lots of debris. She hadn’t been there for decades, and this brought out a flood of memories that hadn’t come forth in the interview.
A genealogy interview is really not different than any other kind of interview. Effective preparation, courteous conducting of the interview, and prompt follow-up are all keys. From these interviews, your family tree research can flourish.
David A. Todd - David Todd is a civil engineer, a genealogist, a citizen concerned with the environment, and a writer by passion.
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